Friday, October 14, 2011

The Eye of Betrayal

On Sunday, I somehow scratched my right eye.

Now, I didn’t know this until Monday morning when I woke up with my eye screaming at me.

Ms. Right Eye was NOT a happy camper.

In fact, when I went to put in my contact, she threw a fit and refused to cooperate. She turned red-er and leaky-er (and gross-er). And then the skin around her (to show solidarity, I think) grew puffy and pink.

It was not a pretty sight! (Not that I could see it really well.)

So, that led to no work on Monday (which should have been “yay!” but because of the eye sitch was more of a “boo… my eye hurts… I’ll just sleep in sadness…”)

And it’s also made me wear my glasses this whole week.

And that fact has led me to this post, because you would think that switching from contacts to glasses would be no big deal, especially since it’s the same prescription.

But you would be wrong, my friends. Very wrong!

Here is a small list of things I’ve had to deal with as I’ve worn glasses this week to show you WHY I HATE GLASSES AND THINK THEY’RE DUMB (aside from giving me the gift of sight, which is awesome):

1) They make me feel like I’m walking slightly uphill (everywhere I go) (even when I know I’m going downhill).

2) They make things look smaller than I know they are.

3) They make things look farther away than I know they are.

4) They mess with my depth perception (see points 1, 2 and 3).

5) They make me hit myself in the face when blow-drying my hair (twice) (see points 3 and 4).

6) They limit my peripheral vision and make me have to turn my head (when I remember in time, which is never).

7) They make me get honked at while driving (see points 2, 3, 4, and especially 6).

8) They make me almost die while driving (see points 2, 3, 4, 6, and 7).

9) They make my eyes ache.

10) They give me a headache EVERY DAY!!! (see point 9).

11) They make me go home and sit in a stupor because I don’t know what to do with myself (see points 9 and 10).

12) They give me an excuse not to try to do anything after work because I can’t see properly, anyway (see points 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 9, 10, and 11).

13) They make me go to sleep earlier than normal (and then lie there, pining for accurate vision) (see points 9, 10, 11, and 12)

14) They make me feel like a loser because I’ve done ABSOLUTELY nothing all week: no reading, no writing, no painting, no meeting with friends, no after work adventures, no nothing!

Tomorrow, Saturday, I’m going to try my contacts again because I have a lot of catching up to do (the next step on a new painting; writing for my writing group deadline on Monday; reading, sweet reading; etc.)

Please pray for me.

I mean it. Please!!!! Pretty please!!!!!!

I can’t handle my glasses anymore*.

*I know you’re thinking “Sounds like you need new glasses, Liz.” And you’re probably right. But, honestly, ever since I switched to wearing contacts 15+ years ago, wearing glasses always creates these side-effects for me. Always. It’s very disappointing, because fashion wise, there are such cute glasses!

1 comment:

Camille said...

I just shuddered a little while reading this. I feel your pain. I hate switching to glasses. It is never the right perscription and I feel like my world is out of whack when I have to wear glasses during the day. I'm sorry. I will indeed pray for you. Good luck!