Thursday, January 31, 2008

Addendum: What actually happened…

In the end, I was only able to accomplish numbers 4 and 6. And do you want to know why?

Because my department director sat behind me and to the side (so she had a full view of what I was doing) and my assistant director sat right next to me! Darn! Double darn!

So, I had to scrap all my plans and come up with new things to do.

Here’s a list of what I did, in no particular order:

1. Contemplated how fast I could kill myself with a pen.

2. Contemplated if it would be faster to kill myself with my notepad. (No.)

3. Contemplated how fast I could kill a co-worker (who was yapping for 20 minutes about student’s who don’t sign their documents) with my pen and notepad, combined. (A double whammy!) He would know...

4. Paid attention because I was surrounded by "the man" and was in the front row.

5. Kept my top from peek-a-booing my bra. (Why did I wear that stupid shirt?)

6. Played tic-tac-toe by myself. (Not as easy as you would think. I’m a good tic-tac-toe player.)

7. Took notes with my left hand in an attempt to make myself ambidextrous in 3 hours time. (I did improve some.)

8. Tried to induce a meditative trance to escape into my “happy place.”

9. Made a paper spitball and threatened a co-worker with an attack. (In my imagination, of course. I’m too refined to make an actual spitball. (Or, am I? (wink, wink))).

And 10. Put a pox on 3 co-workers for asking the stupidest questions, like “When the phone rings, am I supposed to answer it?” “Does the mail go in the mail bin?” “When a student comes to the counter for assistance, should I stop what I’m doing and help them?”)

So, that was my day yesterday.

Aren’t you jealous?


Laura said...

Please tell me that those aren't real questions. Although, I deal with "highly compensated" people all day. I mean, these are CEOs and other high level execs of major corporations. Today I got this one..."so if I put 40% to one fund and 10% to another one...that's 50% right?" And another of my favorites "I'm enrolling on your website and I see the "enroll" button and it says "click here", so should I click there?" I'm totally serious...people making a million dollars or more a year ask these kinds of questions.

Heather said...

Some people are super intelligent, like the customer who called to day asking how to test her software.
I asked: "Did you read the instructions? It's all explained in the instructions."
To which she replied: "I didnt get any."
"They were sent with the software. It says 'testing' on the top."
"Oh, I threw all that away."
Um, do you think we send that to you for fun?

PS-I Love, LOVE the added links!

Anonymous said...

What's disquieting is that I alwasy lose tic-tac-toe against myself.