Friday, May 1, 2009

To Cut, or Not to Cut my Nunchuck Strings…

So, as some of you may know, I am a certificated nunchucker. Totally professional about it and everything! (What? I’m serious!)

And now that I’ve advanced to the wood nunchucks (with bruises to prove it), I’ve become a renegade! (The law frowns upon wood nunchucks in California.)

Our (Rachel, Katie, Heather and yours truly) Sensei has joked by saying that if our homes are ever raided by the police, we should have scissors close by to cut the strings so we’re not brought up on felony (I’m not kidding!) charges.

And we would laugh and laugh! As if we would ever have the Po-Po in our homes because of criminal behavior! (Sure, we might if we were robbed or something, but not because we’re law breakers. Ha!)

Well, yesterday my friends, I almost had to cut my strings!*

You see, yesterday my apartment had two detectives (from the O.C.) in it to question one of my roommates (aka: sister Rebecca) about a robbery of which she was the SUSPECT!


::PAUSE FOR DRAMATIC EFFECT AND MENTAL ABSORBTION::


Wednesday, my parents had received a call from Detective M. asking if Becca (or Bank Robbing Bec, as I now call her) “has ever been convicted of a felony, because she sort of could be now, and could you please have her give me a call. Here’s the case number...”

(The detective called my parents instead of Becca directly because as part of her flouting authority, she never updated her driver’s license after moving out. Oh, what a tangled web we weave!)

You can imagine the affect this had on the parental units. (I’ll take “Panic” for 200 hundred, Alex!)

Immediately after hanging up with the police, my parents frantically call B. R. Bec at work, but couldn’t get a hold of her. So, they call my sister Cash (whose nickname is just coincidental…or is it?) who tries to call, but still no luck! So, Cash calls me, (because Bec and I work at the same university), and tells me briefly of the situation and what course of action I need to take: “Becca needs to call the police because she’s the suspect in a robbery of an Office Store**! Run over to her office a get her!!!!!!”

But, since I’m getting ready to leave, and don’t want to walk in the opposite direction to get Becca because I'm lazy, I decide it would be faster to call one of her co-workers, tell her it’s an emergency (without mentioning “jail time” )and “could she please interrupt Becca’s counseling session and put her on the phone!”

I then tell Bank Robbing Bec what I know. She’s stunned. (Or is she?) And eventually calls my parents to get the information.


STAY TUNED FOR PART TWO OF THE CASE OF MISSING POST IT NOTES...



*Instead, I opted to hide my nunchucks in my dirty laundry basket under a pile of my unmentionables.

**Since this is an ongoing investigation, I’m not giving the actual name of the store. I don’t want to have a reason for the police to come back and confiscate my nunchucks!

4 comments:

rachelsaysso said...

What the....?!?!

And you're really going to keep us hanging? All weekend? You had better spill it...and fast! Or I'm coming over tonight to get the scoop.

And Becca's felonious ways could have gotten you arrested! Smart thinking to hide them in the hamper. You can keep them over at my place the next time they come.

Liz the Poet said...

Not to worry Rachel, I'm planning on posting Part 2, tomorrow, and Part 3 Sunday morning.

I don't ever post on the weekend, and I wanted to shake things up!

Andrea said...

I can't take all this suspense! As much as I am against it, I will be turning my computer on during the weekend just to get the full scoop. Please keep those nunchunks hidden, you promised to entertain the crowd at the reception, remember?!

Amanda said...

My chin is still resting in my lap!!! What the....?!?! is right. Seriously? I've always watched those cop shows where people say they are innocent and I think that even if they aren't guilty of that particular thing, I'm sure they've done something else naughty, because what kind of upstanding citizens actually get pinned as a suspect in some crime if they aren't actually those kind of people anyway.
Now I have to totally rethink things. Or just stop watching cop shows. Hmmm...
I seriously can't believe it.
I am on the computer every day of the week, so you better believe I will be checking the updates tomorrow and Sunday! This is way too good.